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dark lord oveildosh
Ok everyone, this is my first story, and, heck, I'm new at this, please, after reading this first chapter, contstructive critism is greatly appreciated, and, dont expect updates on this story to come often, if you even choose to follow this of course, anyway, read, enjoy, and any tips, greatly appreciated. thank you for your time

Time passes, Ages melt, History turns to legend, legend to myth, and eventually, even myth fades from the minds of all. This story, where magic and myth runs open and free, Is set after many events, such as: The war With the Overly impressive Alien race called the ‘Reptiles’ Has been won, at a cost, the cost of a great man, A werewolf, to be exact, The legendary Fornsash Darkwolf, The Leader of Maigam’s order, The ‘Father’ of the werewolves, The oldest Werewolf in existence. Alas, this is not his story, but this is a Story, The story of a man, Known by some, unknown by most, An important actor in days to come, the cast is assembled, the play set, this is a beginning, and an ending, war is on the horizon, war to come, to past, and to cause many falls, and many triumphs, civilization is tested, A story to be known, and story to be told.
Early morning, Dawn, location, unknown, My name, Joshua Tanner, not much to say about myself, I’m white, 5 foot 7’ I have deep sea blue eyes, I weigh about 140 lbs, I’m 19, I usually wear a long sleeved tee-shirt, and black jeans pants, I work as a custom bow maker, at least, I used to… before it happened. I should explain myself, my story; it starts three weeks ago, in southern New York. It was a peaceful morning, I got up, brushed my teeth, and did my morning routine, then, then it got interesting.
On my way to work at my shop, which I walk to, because I had the grace of having an apartment nearby where I work, I met one of my friends, Silva, Pray siriam she is still alive, she works in the forest areas around New York City, I stopped, and we had a chat. “It just wasn’t natural.” She said. “That wolf… it just, seemed to know what I was saying, it was just… too large for a normal wolf.”
“An escaped zoo animal?” I asked after a moment’s hesitation
“The wolf had no identification of any kind, nothing, it was just like a wild wolf, except… larger, it just felt wrong.”
“Weird, I think you need a vacation, anyway, I’ll see you later I’ve to get to work.”
“A vacation… yea, I should get one.” She said absentmindedly. “Oh, Well, I’ll call you after work?”
“Sure!” I said hurriedly, Siriam knows I like her. In a flash, I hurried away, enjoying what I hoped was going to happen tonight, or, so I thought. Fate is a cruel master, so very cruel.
The beginning of my work day was uninteresting, and boring, until around noon. That is when he first appeared in my life.
He was tall, taller than any man I have ever seen, at least 7 feet tall His features indistinguishable under A tattered brown cloak, his hood was up I couldn’t see his face, but I did see his eyes, his bright yellow-orange eyes, the eyes of a wolf. I should have listened to my instincts when he came in, they all screamed at me to throw him out of my store, I didn’t listen, Light! Why didn’t I listen!? “I want a bow.” He simply said in a deep, base voice
“Good place to get one, not one finer in New York.”
“We’ll see.”
I wanted to throw him out, light, I should have thrown him out, Light, why didn’t I throw him out? “What kind of bow do you want?” I asked, still not realizing the danger I was in. “I have longbows, short, hunting, all kinds of bows, take your pick.”
I turned around, and it was too late. With a flash, like a viper, he was on me. Quickly and deftly, he broke my arms and pushed me to my knees, then… he turned into a wolf, and sank his teeth deep into my arm. It only happened within moments, but it felt in slow motion. The next thing I knew was I was in my house, in my bed. “Was it a dream?” I asked myself, and then, looking at the mirror in my room, I saw it, where my ears should be, a pair of wolf ears, grey-black wolf ears, my eyes, a bright orange-yellow, like a wolfs’. I felt… younger, faster, stronger, and healthier. It all came in slowly, at first, I gathered my thoughts, I knew this neighborhood wasn’t the best for me now, for the Neko gangs in the area. I had to leave, I had to run, and I did so precisely, Quickly, I got out of bed, and started to gather things for a, permanent camping trip, Flashlight, pistol, food, water, tent, fire starters, flare gun, with extra flares, and my phone.
When I exited my apartment, there as a note on the ground, and it read ‘On the night of the moon full, meet where the breeze blows from the ocean.’


A little note, this is NOT a fan-fiction of any sorts, just a story based in a universe that a few friends, and I have created and built apon, so, if this is in the wrong place, feel free to delete/move this story admins
Jonath
Alright since you asked for constructive criticism:
Firstly you have basic grammar problems. For the most part you spell better than a majority of fanfic writers but you capitalize where you shouldn't and your punctuation is horrendous. Aside from that your introduction is suspiciously similar to the opening narration of Fellowship of the Ring. Also there are a lot of moments where your exposition jerks around for instance when one character "turns into a wolf" you may want to provide some details as to the transformation process so that it sounds a little less dry.
One particular phrase: "ages melt" had me laughing.
I hope this advice helps you. If I've learned anything its that so long as you continue writing and learn from your mistakes you will improve. Looking back my earliest attempts were much worse than this.
dark lord oveildosh
Yes, I do admit, I was thinking of the intro for fellowship of the ring when I made the intro, and, thank you for the advice Jonath
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